Opinions That Matter

An Internet acquaintance in my "home base" Facebook group asked who could define "cupiosexual" without Googling. Deliberately wrong answers aside, no one managed to cough up a definition.

No surprise, given its meaning:

Cupiosexual, previously known as Kalossexual, is a microlabel on the Asexual Spectrum. Cupiosexual is defined as someone who does not experience sexual attraction but still desires/likes a sexual relationship.

I found that definition on a page about asexuals, because of course there is a page about asexuals, because the Internet, much like the Dixie Square Mall that Jake and Elwood Blues demolished in their repurposed Mount Prospect police cruiser, has everything.

The term itself is destined, much like the near-infinite neologism-wannabes effluviating from the sustainably-sourced straw towers of Woketopistan (... yeah, I just went a bit overboard...) to be forgotten. There are just too many words of too little interest to anyone but the identity loons to keep up with.

What will stay with me is the term "microlabel."

Some time back, I encountered the phrase "hyper-stratification" as a description - and caution - of the trend of ever-greater granulation in identity politics. Like some OCD types with a brand new P-Touch, those who live in the identity politics world can never have enough labels. The list of genders has grown from a handful to dozens to at least a couple hundred across the years I've been paying attention.

A classic aspect of addictive behavior is "chasing the first high." Whether it be recreational drugs, gambling, or more benign behaviors, addiction has an escalating aspect about it born of the mundaneness of the "same old." I can easily see this business of endless sorting of people into smaller and smaller subgroups as an addiction, given how cutting-edge it must feel to those who think they've discovered some deep and long-repressed truths about human nature and sexuality.

At the core of this is a very unfortunate phenomenon - the increasing pursuit of external validation.

Among social media's worst consequences is the addictive nature of "likes," shares, retweets, and other forms of acknowledgment and approval. I freely admit I get a little zing of happiness (though perhaps not quite the “tingle up my leg” that Chris Matthews got from hearing Obama speak) every time I'm notified of a new subscription to this blog (hint.. hint...) or a sharing of a post (hint... hint... hint…). Fortunately, I don't (or at least I don't believe I) live for clicks. They certainly give guidance as to quality or content, and such feedback is important to improving my product, but I take it as a "business" validation, not one of me as a person.

Where it becomes personal is where it goes wrong.

Have you ever taken a random stranger's unkind (or worse) comment on the Internet to heart? If so, why? You know nothing of that person, so there's no reason to grant that person any credibility until it has been earned - and there's even less reason to invest any emotional energy in what some rando says. To do so is to elevate the external over the self - and in doing so, give up a bit of your own individual sovereignty

There is the crux of the problem with identity politics. It is an overt rejection of the individual in favor of labels. It's a message that "you are your labels first, and your self later (or not at all)." That's especially true in your views, opinions, priorities, and politics. Your label is supposed to inform all those, and if you think differently, you think wrong.

The great irony of identity politics is that it's superficially about freeing our individuality from old and restrictive cultural norms, but at its core it is even more demanding of conformity.

A few years back, I read a book called No Angel, about an ATF agent that went undercover to infiltrate the Hells Angels motorcycle club. One bit stood out - the dissonance of these "1%er" rebels having a very long and restrictive list of rules, that covered behavior, attire, and much else. That there was a bit of an Internet hullaballoo over Jax Teller wearing white sneakers instead of boots in the show Sons of Anarchy affirmed this, as do the various dress codes that such clubs enforce. Even in rebellion, there’s a tendency to submission.

All this is born of our desire to belong, to be accepted by a desirable group, that's wired into our DNA. Such desire is too easily manipulated into subordination of the self to the group's demands, and the new tools of modern culture (see: social media and the Internet overall) make that subordination easier and more beneficial than ever. There are many tales of ex-influencers feeling their lives became empty and trivial despite, or more accurately, because of, the pursuit and achievement of 'likes.'

Before embracing an opinion, we should decide how much it matters. In doing so, we regain our individual sovereignty - the principle that birthed and built this nation. If we grant too much power to strangers on the Internet, we make ourselves more susceptible to those who'd control our lives by reducing us to the labels they created for us.

Woke reached the racket stage when canceling became a thing. Some Internet sage once observed that 'woke without cancel culture would not be a problem.' That's never meant to be, though - the power that identity politics' externalization of validation offers to the cynical is too tempting.

There are many ways to combat the eternal creep of statism and external control into our lives. Keeping our individuality above the coerced conformity at the heart of identity politics is a vital one.

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Yours in liberty,

Peter.